Mens Room Etiquette

So this is something that I should have written about a long time ago. I hate the fact that I have been a ridiculous slacker and have not been updating this thing like I should be. I started thinking about writing this post about two years ago before this blog was even born. The bathroom situations at the radio stations were bad, but not as bad as they have turned out here in Chicago. So please read and enjoy, these are the Do's and Do Not's of Men's Room Etiquette.

Do: Walk into the men's room in a casual fashion and walk to the receptacle of your choice.
Do Not: Burst into the men's room and have your zipper down when you are still more then ten feet from anywhere from that previously mentioned receptacle.

Do: Stand at the urinal and make sure that your aim is accurate.
Do Not: Stand three feet back from the urinal and see the how far you can arch it.

Do: Maintain a stance that promotes privacy for both you and other bathroom dwellers.
Do Not: Stand at the urinal with your pants undone and hovering around mid-thigh. you are no longer in grade school.

Do: Wash Your Hands!
Do Not: Use the bathroom and then just walk out. You are the reason I have to use a paper towel to open the door.

Do: Please Wash Your Hands!
Do Not: Pretend to wash your hands. It takes just as long to pretend to wash your hands as it does to actually wash them.

Do: Feel free to greet someone on the way in or out of the men's room.
Do Not: Stand and the urinal next to me and insist on looking at me and trying to have a conversation with me.

Do: Throw your paper towel in the trash.
Do Not: Throw the paper towel on the floor or in the urinal. We have had major leakage from paper towel jams and if they are on the floor they have been tracked all the way down the hallway.

Do: Retire to the bathroom to let out some exhaust or make a quick phone call.
Do Not: Lean against the wall near me while I am handling my business and talking about the what you and your douche bag friends did last night.

Do: Feel comfortable in the bathroom.
Do Not: Make noises while talking care of your business that make me feel very uncomfortable in the bathroom.

Do: Use the urinal of your choice.
Do Not: Use the buffer urinal if there are three and the end ones are being used. Go into the stall or just wait it out. The buffer is a necessity.

These are all of the rules that I have seen broken already this morning in the office. Will these things ever change?

If you have any good etiquette tips, feel free to leave them in the comments section.